So it's 2009

I run by alot of rules and I've got many New years resolutions. My first one is to never say No so i can go on to doing alot of social events. Second one is to never wear a jacket, this is because my jacket makes me look like an old man and i really haven't got another jacket that looks hip and would keep me warm in the winter. Third is to make looking for work my job so i'll wake up at 7 and have breakfast and then start looking for work from 9 til 5. that to me is a brilliant idea to get work!

The others are to upate my journal and blog daily and to keep a photo diary which i've started first picture of me is up on facebook and myspace!

So hopefully you won't be getting sick of me!

Happy New Year! Enjoy this one much more than the last one.

The Girl With No Name

I watch with amazement
wondering if you will ever catch my gaze
Is this for my amusement
or am i going through a phase

I want to aproach you
Talk to you
maybe, even hold you
I feel like a stalker
trapped in a cage

I see you at the bus stop
I see you following me
Am i the one stalking you
or are you stalking me?

I wish i had the courage
To turn around and ask
What is your name
But to me
You'll remain the girl with no name



That is a poem by me. not one of my best poems but one of all my poems. I am normally shy to show my writing so apreciate it.

Got A New Girlfriend

Well from today I have got a girlfreind and finally one from the local area and I haven't had a girlfreind from the local area for 7 years I normally go for girls that aren't easy to be with. So this is definitly a change but is it a good change? I really don't know I am constantly thinking is this a good decision or a bad one and I am currently writing a song about it, with many other projects put to side I always thought I wasn't creative but to think about it I am because I write songs make screenplays and also tried to write a little novel and know and again a poem.

Must be said I'm no good at poetry so my song lyrics are mostly a load of crap but you can judge them as I am going to be posting my lyrics and novellettes on here when I get time so people outside of my group of mates can judge I do like being judged but don't be too harsh on me. I have thought of going into film creating and all that so I am mostly wrong about my creativeness.

Memory Problems

I'm sure I've got memory problems I can't remember what my Dad told me saturday about today because I normally meet him in a pub down town about 6pm but on saturday he said "Now I'm on the sick, I can see you early on thursdays" and I can't remember if he said that he'll see me at an earlier time today. I'm sure if he did I would of put it in my calendar on my phone for future reference. But knowing me maybe I forgot to note it in, just have to wait and see if he turns up at 6pm.

Suicide

Suicide is a nasty way of dying because you leave a note saying bye to everyone but what they don't realise they'll be missed by freinds and family and by doing what they did makes them feel guilty on why they didn't do nothing on their scream for help and they wonder if they could of done something. Well a freind of mine is thinking of commiting suicide I really hope they don't because I find the person amazing but lately she's been down and I just want her to cheer up and enjoy life but you can't make someone do that so I'll just hope she don't get round to doing it and figure out all her problems and her freinds will have some more sense to stick by her and help her through this rough patch in her life because that's all she needs right now is support and I can't be there for her when she's so far away, all I can do is sit back and watch her life get sabutaged by friends ignoring her scream for help, times like this is when you know life for some people sucks enough to want to end it. Basically I just want it to be all talk and no action.

I know this isn't a nice topic to blog about but it happens in so many ways every day it could be a loved one, a friend even family just be there for someone when you know they need you it's a good deed, try and talk them round it can make all the difference.

I Haven't Blogged Much Lately

So let's update you with what's happening... The bet is still on and I got 20 odd days to get on my mates sister Jo it's going to be hard because she's 19 and I think she hates me because Jordan and the boys have been spreading roumers about me that are bad. So basically it's a challenge because she doesn't live with my mate anymore and I don't know what days she works and her brother is always up hafod so I can't really hit on her infront of him so that's a problem.

I've took down my other blog because blogger are gettin tough on people who have music up for grabs on it so I deleted it. Sorry to the one follower that was following it.

That's practically what's happened lately in my stupid life. Hoping to be writing more often.

I Desperatly Need New Mates!

Well over the last 8 years I've been bothering with the same people and they're into different things to me and the only connection between us all is that we're all funny and like comedies. Basically I feel like an outsider with them and all my mates are under 18 so going to the pub with them is out of question. I always used to do things for them but when it comes to me they say no, it's like "do you want to come to a gig with us go on it'll be fun" and I say "yeah go on then" even though I hate the music they listen to, I do it because they get to spend some time with a friend now if I asked them to see a gig with my music god it's an uproar so I'd go on my own most of the time. I'm into indie rock and they're into heavy metal so it's a bit of a difference but atleast I don't listen to R'n'b or any of the shit that goes into the mainstream.

There's alot of disconnections between us, for instance the music, games, scene and fashion. These are just the mates I bother with all the time, I've got lots more mates but from a different area so I have to travel to see them and half the time it's not bad because I get a rest from the original freinds and see new faces, i'm currently thinking of just bothering with people from a different area. That's my rant for today!